My wife’s two-year battle with cancer was a game changer.

While I struggled to accept her battle, she embraced it like a trooper.  Her faith – always firmly rooted in Christ – grew even as her body weakened.  She was frail, bald, emaciated and she was gloriously beautiful.

As I reflect back on those years (2007 – 2009), I remember, most vividly, her vital walk with Christ.

It was as if she and Jesus never parted company.

When her war with cancer’s most fierce battles were finally behind us, she looked at me and asked a question that would launch a new season of life for our whole family:

“Do you think it’s possible to feel as close to Christ now as I did then?  I mean, can I live this now cancer-free life fully in His presence like I did when I was sick?”

We weren’t sure what the answer was, but we both hoped it was a resounding YES!  We began reading all we could on how to live the ‘with God’ life.  Eventually we stumbled on to Silence and Solitude by Ruth Haley Barton.

After reading Ruth’s magnificent book, we felt God calling us to rearrange our life around our desire for more of Him and His presence in our midst.  This calling would also lead us to launch a new church that would emphasize spiritual formation.

Disruptus captures our ongoing rearrangement story.


The discoveries, practices and experiences explored through this blog are all birthed in and emerge from the dear people with whom I am privileged to share my life. This journey begins with my bride, Melissa. She is the greatest and most enduring testimony to all that is real in my life. Her life-with-God-life has stirred my passion and desire to live my life with God in ever-increasing and vital ways.

My dear children, JB, Luke and Hayla are also on this wonderful ride with us. These three serve as loving mirrors of my own image. They have endured much under my leadership. They have been challenged, defeated and encouraged in ways that are unimaginable to most.  They would be the first to convey how deeply and wonderfully their father has changed and how vast and great is the need for him to continue to do so.

This journey is not possible apart from a faithful, loving and wonderful community of believers God has joined together.  A Well Loved SoulWe call this community Pillar Community Church.

I love this community. Though they are not my biological family, they are indeed a wonderful family to me. In fact, they are my family’s family!!

The presence of Pillar with and in me is the presence of God’s grace and mercy over and through me.


The title of this blog, DisruptusRenovatus, is a transliteration of old English/Latin terms. I have intentionally used  the past participial form of the terms to emphasize their adjectival capacity.

In other words, the words are used to describe an ongoing and ever-growing experience of spiritual formation. The terms, used together, accentuate a cherished belief: lasting change requires ongoing disruption.  I find this to be particularly true when speaking of deep inner change associated with spiritual formation.



Your will find the following features on DisruptusRenovatus:

  • One such feature is a personal story of Porn addiction and my recovery. My ongoing freedom from porn is a wonderful outcome of this life-with-God journey.  It’s one I believe will inspire hope to many.  It’s certainly a message we need to hear in today’s porn saturated culture.

Porn Watch Protocol

  • A second feature is a presentation and expression of a variety of spiritual Practices and Rhythms designed to open us to God’s presence and respond to His gracious presence in our midst!

ARt of Welcome 3

  • A third feature is Poetry and forms of poetic expression.  Much of the poetry is my own creation and was birthed after this life-with-God journey began.  I also include my favorites from history.  I include poetry primarily because it’s both disruptive and renewing.

Our Father

To my bride, children and dear church family, this is for you, from you and because of you. I give you thanks.

To my Lord and Savior: I am ever grateful and always hopeful when I am lost in your presence!

To everyone else.  Each of us who sense that it is past time for some DisruptusRenovatus: Welcome aboard!

Disrupting To Renew!


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